The World Cup’s come to the stage were most of us have become desensitised to the sound of the buzzing vuvuzela like becoming desensitised to James Cordon’s podgy comedy outings post match. Or ITV’s over-excessive ad breaks fit to cause some sort of consumer esque epileptic fit. People have even become used to the England team's regular shortcomings.
The dire draw with Algeria had consequences. The atmosphere around Finchley is mixed. Most, like me, were almost moved to tears by the poor performance while some at my local mosque insisted on repeating "1, 2, 3 VIVA ALGERIE"
after my pre-match gloating of England’s credentials.
The constant barrage of England-based jokes texted around culminates in putting public expectation in England’s chances at an all-time low.
It seems that after the World Cup, the British media will cache the cliché of entrusting an Italian to manage football teams as false. Now it seems England have one last chance to salvage this World Cup against Slovenia on Wednesday.
But this deeply ingrained pessimism is perfect for the country. Despite the oddity of the aforementioned statement, its true England need the ‘underdog' tag. As years of hopeless expectation has shown, the healthiest thing for the England squad right now is for the country to be disgracefully hopeless in their support. Thus releasing pressure like some sort of cathartic rehabilitation process not too dissimilar to realising revising for an exam is hopeless and still getting the grades.
This lack of anxiety for England to fulfil public expectation will lead to a spiritually enriching performance using yoga-like football manoeuvres to outclass Slovenia one nil. Slovenia’s only shot straight at England goalkeeper David James will be saved leading to dramatic replays and leading to the camera panning to Robert Green’s face zooming in so close it almost evokes tears from West Ham’s number one.
All this drama will also lead to BBC gloating that it actually showed England’s only goal in HD in an attempt to retain some sort of moral high-ground after losing Chiles and Bleakley to ITV.
In the end, the lack of publicity for England will redeem great results which will carry us through to the quarter finals of the World Cup.
Unfortunately for England though, this revived excitement brings us full circle. The initial World Cup hype will be restored which is a recipe for disaster. While England will use the furore of the great victory over Slovenia to cruise through the second round, there will be a dramatic loss in penalty shoot-out in the quarter final.
The media’s unfortunate hype and the previous hyperbole of a win against an unknown team will lead to horrendous results. I am no psychic; I’m just describing the sociological results of a tragic nation that seeks victory with too much expectation.
If, maybe one day, we acted like the minnows we are, then results would come through. Maybe, just maybe.
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